Internet Relay Chat

Intro to IRC

Internet Relay Chat (IRC) is a real-time chat protocol originally developed in 1988. IRC relies on networks of connected servers running an IRC daemon (or IRCd). Users can connect to these networks and create group chatrooms called channels. Channels are operated and managed independently of the administration of the network as a whole. It is also possible to communicate with individual users via private message.

An IRC client is required to connect to an IRC network. Vast numbers of clients exist, with various different features, although all clients will provide the same basic functionality. A few of the more prominent IRC clients are listed below.

  • KiwiIRC (Web) — A popular web client (an IRC client that runs in the browser). KiwiIRC lacks some of the more advanced features of other clients, but its simplicity makes it a good fit for newcomers to IRC.
  • IRCCloud (Web, iOS, Android) — A web client with dedicated apps for iOS and Android. Notable for syncing logs across platforms, and for its built-in bouncer service. Requires a separate registration to use.
  • ChatZilla (Firefox Add-on) — A browser add-on for Mozilla Firefox. Noted for its high degree of customizability and its powerful scripting tools.
  • HexChat (Windows, OS X, Linux) — A cross-platform desktop client (an IRC client that must be downloaded and installed, and runs as a separate application). Highly customizable, and includes a number of advanced features, including support for Lua, Perl, and Python scripts.
  • Quassel (Windows, OS X, Linux) — A cross-platform desktop client. Quassel includes the capability of running a “core” which remains connected to IRC, and to which multiple different clients can connect to simultaneously. Or you can just use it like a normal IRC client.
  • mIRC (Windows) — A desktop client for Windows. Highly customizable and extensible via scripting.
  • Colloquy (OS X) — A desktop client for OS X. Notable for its adherence to the Apple Human Interface guidelines.
  • Irssi (Windows, OS X, Linux) — A cross-platform desktop client that runs in a terminal. Not for novices.

The Newshound Chatroom

The official IRC channel for Newshound (as well as for the other works of M.T. Bade) is #wolf&wizard on the SynIRC network. To join, simply connect your IRC client to — SynIRC accepts connections on ports 6660 to 6669, and SSL connections on ports 6697 to 7001. Once connected, the command /join #wolf&wizard will allow you to enter the channel. Note that you will need to register your IRC nick first before you can join the channel; instructions on how to do so can be obtained by entering the command /msg NickServ help register.

While chatting in #wolf&wizard, please keep the following rules in mind:

  • Be nice. Or, to put it in terms of Wheaton’s law, don’t be a dick. You don’t have to like your fellow users, but you do have to be polite to them.
    • You are not the judge of what is and is not dickish. Remember this. It’s better to apologize and change your behavior than to try and argue that whatever you were doing wasn’t dickish. The former will get you unbanned. The latter won’t.
  • Be coherent. Spamming, inane rambling, excessive use of emojis, exclusively speaking in other languages, and/or anything else deemed to egregiously lower the signal-to-noise ratio will not be tolerated.
    • Neither will failing the Turing test. The only bots allowed in the channel are those approved by the channel operators. Bringing an unauthorized bot into the channel, or acting in a manner indistinguishable from a bot, will get you banned.
      • If you want to play with bots, the channel #w&w-bots exists on the same network, and is expressly for testing IRC bots.
  • Be courteous. Follow basic internet courtesy, like marking inappropriate links as NSFW, and putting warnings on flashing videos or gifs.
  • Saying or doing something “ironically” or “jokingly” doesn’t give you a pass on any of these rules. An offensive joke is still offensive, and an ironic shitpost is still a shitpost.
    • Exceptions may be made if it’s actually really funny.
      • You aren’t the judge of whether it’s funny.
  • The channel operators have the final say on what is and is not acceptable. Don’t argue with them about disciplinary actions.
    • Related caveat: #wolf&wizard is not a democracy.
    • If you disagree with a decision of the operators, you have the right to challenge them to a chess match for your soul. Or you could just politely discuss it with them in private messages.
  • If at any time you have a question about these rules, please ask an operator in private messages. They will be more than happy to clarify for you.

Channel IRC Bots

At this time, the only bot allowed in #wolf&wizard is Gordon. Gordon is a general purpose utility bot, written in Python 2.7. He is a third-generation fork of the skybot IRC bot, with additional functionality related to the SCP Wiki. Gordon has a number of useful features, but the ones you are most likely to use are listed here. All of his commands are prefaced with a period (also called a full stop).

  • .tell <nick> — Gives Gordon a message for another user, which he will deliver the next time he sees them.
  • .seen <nick> — Asks Gordon when the specified user was last seen in channel, along with their last message.
  • .google <search term> — Asks Gordon to do a Google search for the specified search terms. Can be abbreviated to .g.
  • .gis <search term> — Asks Gordon to perform a Google Images search for the specified search terms.
  • .youtube <search term> — Asks Gordon to perform a YouTube search for the specified search terms. Can be abbreviated to .y.
  • .remember <word> <data> — Teaches Gordon to respond whenever someone says ?<word>. Additional data can be appended by using .remember <word> + <data>, and substitution editing can be done through .remember <term> s/<old data>/<new data>. Only one factoid can be stored per trigger. Can be abbreviated to .rem.
  • .quote add <nick> <message> — Adds the specified message to the quote file for the indicated nick. Can be abbreviated to .q.
  • .quote [#channel] [nick] [#n] — Looks-up the specified quote. Either a channel or a nick (or both) must be specified, with an optional number parameter to lookup a specific quote. Can be abbreviated to .q.
  • .choose <choice1>, <choice2>, … <choicen> — Choose from one of several provided options. Can be abbreviated to .ch.
  • .dice <diceroll> — Simulates dicerolls. Can do any-sided die and fudge dice. Can be performed using XdY, where X is the number of dice you wish to roll (optional), and Y is the number of sides you want the dice to have. Can also add and subtract the values of different die rolls or static modifiers.
  • .define/.dictionary <word> — Fetches the definition of the chosen word. Has a tendency to be very literal. Can be abbreviated to .def.